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These donations should be made to: Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation PMB 113 1739 University Ave. Oxford, MS 38655-4109 Title: Widger's Quotations from Chesterfield's Letters to his Son Author: David Widger Release Date: October, 2002 [Etext #3531] [Yes, we are about one year ahead of schedule] [The actual date this file first posted = 05/28/01] Edition: 10 Language: English The Project Gutenberg Etext of Widger's Quotations from Lord Chesterfield's Letters to his Son, by David Widger *******This file should be named 3531.txt or 3531.zip****** This etext was produced by David Widger Project Gutenberg Etexts are usually created from multiple editions, all of which are in the Public Domain in the United States, unless a copyright notice is included. Therefore, we usually do NOT keep any of these books in compliance with any particular paper edition. We are now trying to release all our books one year in advance of the official release dates, leaving time for better editing. 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Money should be paid to the: "Project Gutenberg Literary Archive Foundation." If you are interested in contributing scanning equipment or software or other items, please contact Michael Hart at: hart@pobox.com **END THE SMALL PRINT! FOR PUBLIC DOMAIN ETEXTS*Ver.04.08.01*END** [Portions of this header are copyright (C) 2001 by Michael S. Hart and may be reprinted only when these Etexts are free of all fees.] [Project Gutenberg is a TradeMark and may not be used in any sales of Project Gutenberg Etexts or other materials be they hardware or software or any other related product without express permission.] This etext was produced by David Widger WIDGER'S QUOTATIONS FROM THE PROJECT GUTENBERG EDITION OF LORD CHESTERFIELD'S LETTERS TO HIS SON by David Widger CONTENTS: The Entire PG Edition of Chesterfield .....[LC#11][lcewk10.txt]3261 Complete Letters to His Son ...............[LC#11][lc11s10.txt]3361 Letters To His Son 1766-71, ...............[LC#10][lc10s10.txt]3360 Letters To His Son 1759-65, ...............[LC#09][lc09s10.txt]3359 Letters To His Son 1756-58, ...............[LC#08][lc08s10.txt]3358 Letters To His Son 1753-54, ...............[LC#07][lc07s10.txt]3357 Letters To His Son 1752, ..................[LC#06][lc06s10.txt]3356 Letters To His Son 1751, ..................[LC#05][lc05s10.txt]3355 Letters To His Son 1750, ..................[LC#04][lc04s10.txt]3354 Letters To His Son 1749, ..................[LC#03][lc03s10.txt]3353 Letters To His Son 1748, ..................[LC#02][lc02s10.txt]3352 Letters To His Son 1746-47, ...............[LC#01][lc01s10.txt]3351 EDITOR'S NOTE Readers acquainted with the letters of Lord Chesterfield to His Son may wish to see if their favorite passages are listed in this selection. The etext editor will be glad to add your suggestions. One of the advantages of internet over paper publication is the ease of quick revision. All the titles may be found using the Project Gutenberg search engine at: http://promo.net/pg/ After downloading a specific file, the location and complete context of the quotations may be found by inserting a small part of the quotation into the 'Find' or 'Search' functions of the user's word processing program. The quotations are in two formats: 1. Small passages from the text. 2. Lists of alphabetized one-liners. The editor may be contacted at for comments, questions or suggested additions to these extracts. D.W. WIDGER'S QUOTATIONS LETTERS TO HIS SON, 1746-47 [LC#01][lc01sxxx.xxx]3351 DEAR BOY: There is nothing which I more wish that you should know, and which fewer people do know, than the true use and value of time. It is in everybody's mouth; but in few people's practice. Have a real reserve with almost everybody; and have a seeming reserve with almost nobody; for it is very disagreeable to seem reserved, and very dangerous not to be so. Few people find the true medium; many are ridiculously mysterious and reserved upon trifles; and many imprudently communicative of all they know. There is nothing that people bear more impatiently, or forgive less, than contempt; and an injury is much sooner forgotten than an insult. The young leading the young, is like the blind leading the blind; (they will both fall into the ditch.) The only sure guide is, he who has often gone the road which you want to go. People will, in a great degree, and not without reason, form their opinion of you, upon that which they have of your friends; and there is a Spanish proverb, which says very justly, TELL ME WHO YOU LIVE WITH AND I WILL TELL YOU WHO YOU ARE! Attention and civility please all Avoid singularity Blindness of the understanding is as much to be pitied Choose your pleasures for yourself Civility, which is a disposition to accommodate and oblige others Complaisant indulgence for people's weaknesses Contempt Disagreeable to seem reserved, and very dangerous not to be so Do as you would be done by Do what you are about Dress well, and not too well Dress like the reasonable people of your own age Easy without too much familiarity Employ your whole time, which few people do Exalt the gentle in woman and man--above the merely genteel Eyes and ears open and mouth mostly shut Fit to live--or not live at all Flexibility of manners is necessary in the course of the world Genteel without affectation Geography and history are very imperfect separately Good-breeding Gratitude not being universal, nor even common Greatest fools are the greatest liars He that is gentil doeth gentil deeds If once we quarrel, I will never forgive Injury is much sooner forgotten than an insult Judge of every man's truth by his degree of understanding Knowing any language imperfectly Knowledge: either despise it, or think that they have enough Labor is the unavoidable fatigue of a necessary journey Let nothing pass till you understand it Life of ignorance is not only a very contemptible, but tiresome Listlessness and indolence are always blameable Make a great difference between companions and friends Make himself whatever he pleases, except a good poet Merit and good-breeding will make their way everywhere Never maintain an argument with heat and clamor Observe, without being thought an observer Only doing one thing at a time Pay them with compliments, but not with confidence Pleasure is the rock which most young people split upon Pride of being the first of the company Real friendship is a slow grower Receive them with great civility, but with great incredulity Recommend (pleasure) to you, like an Epicurean Respectful without meanness, easy without too much familiarity Scarce any flattery is too gross for them to swallow Sentiment-mongers State your difficulties, whenever you have any Studied and elaborate dress of the ugliest women in the world Sure guide is, he who has often gone the road which you want to Talk of natural affection is talking nonsense Nothing so precious as time, and so irrecoverable when lost Unguarded frankness Whatever is worth doing at all, is worth doing well Wrapped up and absorbed in their abstruse speculations LETTERS TO HIS SON, 1748 [LC#02][lc02sxxx.xxx]3352 They go abroad, as they call it; but, in truth, they stay at home all that while; for being very awkward, confoundedly ashamed, and not speaking the languages. If, therefore, you would avoid the accusation of pedantry on one hand, or the suspicion of ignorance on the other, abstain from learned ostentation. Advice is seldom welcome; and those who want it the most always like it the least. Common sense (which, in truth, very uncommon) is the best sense I know of: abide by it, it will counsel you best. La Rochefoucault, is, I know, blamed, but I think without reason, for deriving all our actions from the source of self-love. For my own part, I see a great deal of truth, and no harm at all, in that opinion. It is certain that we seek our own happiness in everything we do. A little learning is a dangerous thing Above all things, avoid speaking of yourself Above the frivolous as below the important and the secret Absolute command of your temper Abstain from learned ostentation Absurd term of genteel and fashionable vices Advice is seldom welcome Affectation in dress Always look people in the face when you speak to them Ancients and Moderns Argumentative, polemical conversations As willing and as apt to be pleased as anybody Authority Better not to seem to understand, than to reply Cannot understand them, or will not desire to understand them Cardinal de Retz Cardinal Virtues, by first degrading them into weaknesses Cautious how we draw inferences Chameleon, be able to take every different hue Cheerful in the countenance, but without laughing Common sense (which, in truth, very uncommon) Commonplace observations Complaisance Consciousness and an honest pride of doing well Contempt Conversation will help you almost as much as books Conversation-stock being a joint and common property Converse with his inferiors without insolence Deserve a little, and you shall have but a little Desirous of praise from the praiseworthy Dexterity enough to conceal a truth without telling a lie Difficulties seem to them, impossibilities Distinguish between the useful and the curious Do as you would be done by Do what you will but do something all day long Either do not think, or do not love to think Equally forbid insolent contempt, or low envy and jealousy Even where you are sure, seem rather doubtful Every virtue, has its kindred vice or weakness Fiddle-faddle stories, that carry no information along with them Flattery of women Forge accusations against themselves Forgive, but not approve, the bad. Frank, open, and ingenuous exterior, with a prudent interior Gain the affections as well as the esteem Generosity often runs into profusion Go to the bottom of things Good company Graces: Without us, all labor is vain Great learning; which, if not accompanied with sound judgment Great numbers of people met together, animate each other Habit and prejudice Half done or half known Hardly any body good for every thing Have a will and an opinion of your own, and adhere to it Have but one set of jokes to live upon He will find it out of himself without your endeavors Heart has such an influence over the understanding Helps only, not as guides Historians Honest error is to be pitied, not ridiculed Honestest man loves himself best How much you have to do; and how little time to do it in I hope, I wish, I doubt, and fear alternately I shall always love you as you shall deserve. If you would convince others, seem open to conviction yourself Impertinent insult upon custom and fashion Inaction at your age is unpardonable Jealous of being slighted Judge them all by their merits, but not by their ages Keep good company, and company above yourself Know their real value, and how much they are generally overrated Knowledge is like power in this respect Knowledge of a scholar with the manners of a courtier Laughing, I must particularly warn you against it Lazy mind, and the trifling, frivolous mind Let me see more of you in your letters Little minds mistake little objects for great ones Loud laughter is the mirth of the mob Low buffoonery, or silly accidents, that always excite laughter Low company, most falsely and impudently, call pleasure Luther's disappointed avarice Make yourself necessary Manner of doing things is often more important Manners must adorn knowledge May not forget with ease what you have with difficulty learned More one sees, the less one either wonders or admires More you know, the modester you should be Mortifying inferiority in knowledge, rank, fortune Most long talkers single out some one unfortunate man in company Much sooner forgive an injustice than an insult Mystical nonsense Name that we leave behind at one place often gets before us Neglect them in little things, they will leave you in great Negligence of it implies an indifference about pleasing Neither retail nor receive scandal willingly Never quit a subject till you are thoroughly master of it Never seem wiser, nor more learned, than the people you are with Never slattern away one minute in idleness Never to speak of yourself at all Not one minute of the day in which you do nothing at all Not to admire anything too much Oftener led by their hearts than by their understandings Out of livery; which makes them both impertinent and useless Overvalue what we do not know Pay your own reckoning, but do not treat the whole company People angling for praise People never desire all till they have gotten a great deal Plain notions of right and wrong Planted while young, that degree of knowledge now my refuge Pleased to some degree by showing a desire to please Pleasing in company is the only way of being pleased in yourself Pleasure and business with equal inattention Prefer useful to frivolous conversations Pride remembers it forever Prudent reserve Reason ought to direct the whole, but seldom does Refuge of people who have neither wit nor invention of their own Refuse more gracefully than other people could grant Repeating Represent, but do not pronounce Rochefoucault Rough corners which mere nature has given to the smoothest Scandal: receiver is always thought, as bad as the thief Scarcely any body who is absolutely good for nothing Scrupled no means to obtain his ends Secrets Seeming frankness with a real reserve Seeming openness is prudent Self-love draws a thick veil between us and our faults Serious without being dull Shakespeare Shepherds and ministers are both men Some complaisance and attention to fools is prudent Some men pass their whole time in doing nothing Something or other is to be got out of everybody Swearing Take nothing for granted, upon the bare authority of the author Take, rather than give, the tone of the company you are in Talk often, but never long Talk sillily upon a subject of other people's Talking of either your own or other people's domestic affairs Tell me whom you live with, and I will tell you who you are Tell stories very seldom The best have something bad, and something little The worst have something good, and sometimes something great Thin veil of Modesty drawn before Vanity Thoroughly, not superficially To know people's real sentiments, I trust much more to my eyes Unopened, because one title in twenty has been omitted Value of moments, when cast up, is immense Vanity, that source of many of our follies What displeases or pleases you in others What you feel pleases you in them When well dressed for the day think no more of it afterward Will not so much as hint at our follies Witty without satire or commonplace Wrongs are often forgiven; but contempt never is You had much better hold your tongue than them Your merit and your manners can alone raise you LETTERS TO HIS SON, 1749 [LC#03][lc03sxxx.xxx]3353 He always does more than he says. The arrogant pedant does not communicate, but promulgates his knowledge. He does not give it you, but he inflicts it upon you; and is(if possible) more desirous to show you your own ignorance than his own learning. Due attention to the inside of books, and due contempt for the outside, is the proper relation between a man of sense and his books. Cardinal de Retz observes, very justly, that every numerous assembly is a mob, influenced by their passions, humors, and affections, which nothing but eloquence ever did or ever can engage. Frivolous curiosity about trifles, and a laborious attention to little objects which neither require nor deserve a moment's thought, lower a man; who from thence is thought (and not unjustly) incapable of greater matters. Idleness is only the refuge of weak minds, and the holiday of fools. May you live as long as you are fit to live, but no longer! or may you rather die before you cease to be fit to live! A joker is near akin to a buffoon Ablest man will sometimes do weak things Above trifles, he is never vehement and eager about them Advise those who do not speak elegantly, not to speak Always does more than he says Always some favorite word for the time being Arrogant pedant Ascribing the greatest actions to the most trifling causes Assign the deepest motives for the most trifling actions Attend to the objects of your expenses, but not to the sums Attention to the inside of books Awkward address, ungraceful attitudes and actions Being in the power of every man to hurt him Can hardly be said to see what they see Cardinal Mazarin Cardinal Richelieu Complaisance due to the custom of the place Conjectures supply the defect of unattainable knowledge Connive at knaves, and tolerate fools Deep learning is generally tainted with pedantry Deepest learning, without good-breeding, is unwelcome Desirous of pleasing Dictate to them while you seem to be directed by them Dissimulation is only to hide our own cards Do not become a virtuoso of small wares Does not give it you, but he inflicts it upon you Endeavors to please and oblige our fellow-creatures Every man pretends to common sense Every numerous assembly is a mob Eyes and the ears are the only roads to the heart Few dare dissent from an established opinion Few things which people in general know less, than how to love Flattering people behind their backs Fools never perceive where they are ill-timed Friendship upon very slight acquaintance Frivolous curiosity about trifles Frivolous, idle people, whose time hangs upon their own hands Gain the heart, or you gain nothing General conclusions from certain particular principles Good manners Haste and hurry are very different things Herd of mankind can hardly be said to think Human nature is always the same Hurt those they love by a mistaken indulgence Idleness is only the refuge of weak minds If I don't mind his orders he won't mind my draughts Inattentive, absent; and distrait Incontinency of friendship among young fellows Indiscriminate familiarity Inquisition Insist upon your neither piping nor fiddling yourself Insolent civility It is not sufficient to deserve well; one must please well too Know the true value of time Known people pretend to vices they had not Knows what things are little, and what not Learn, if you can, the WHY and the WHEREFORE Leave the company, at least as soon as he is wished out of it Led, much oftener by little things than by great ones Little failings and weaknesses Love with him, who they think is the most in love with them Machiavel Mastery of one's temper May you live as long as you are fit to live, but no longer! May you rather die before you cease to be fit to live Moderation with your enemies Most people have ears, but few have judgment; tickle those ears Never implicitly adopt a character upon common fame Never would know anything that he had not a mind to know No man is distrait with the man he fears, or the woman he loves Nothing in courts is exactly as it appears to be Our understandings are generally the DUPES of our hearts People will repay, and with interest too, inattention Perfection of everything that is worth doing at all POLITICIANS NEITHER LOVE NOR HATE Public speaking Quietly cherished error, instead of seeking for truth Reciprocally profess wishes which they seldom form Reserve with your friends Six, or at most seven hours sleep Sooner forgive an injury than an insult There are many avenues to every man Those who remarkably affect any one virtue Three passions that often put honesty to most severe trials To great caution, you can join seeming frankness and openness Trifling parts, with their little jargon Truth leaves no room for compliments We have many of those useful prejudices in this country Whatever pleases you most in others World is taken by the outside of things LETTERS TO HIS SON, 1750 [LC#04][lc04sxxx.xxx]3354 What pleases you in others, will in general please them in you. Spare the persons while you lash the crimes. Pocket all your knowledge with your watch, and never pull it out in company unless desired: the producing of the one unasked, implies that you are weary of the company; and the producing of the other unrequired, will make the company weary of you. People hate those who make them feel their own inferiority. Conceal all your learning carefully.... A man of the world knows the force of flattery; but then he knows how, when, and where to give it; he proportions his dose to the constitution of the patient. He flatters by application, by inference, by comparison, by hint, and seldom directly. Absurd romances of the two last centuries Advocate, the friend, but not the bully of virtue Assurance and intrepidity Attention Author is obscure and difficult in his own language Characters, that never existed, are insipidly displayed Commanding with dignity, you must serve up to it with diligence Complaisance to every or anybody's opinion Conceal all your learning carefully Connections Contempt Content yourself with mediocrity in nothing Dance to those who pipe Decides peremptorily upon every subject Desire to please, and that is the main point Desirous to make you their friend Despairs of ever being able to pay Difference in everything between system and practice Dignity to be kept up in pleasures, as well as in business Distinction between simulation and dissimulation Do not mistake the tinsel of Tasso for the gold of Virgil Doing what may deserve to be written Done under concern and embarrassment, must be ill done Dressed as the generality of people of fashion are Economist of your time Establishing a character of integrity and good manners Feed him, and feed upon him at the same time Flattery Fortune stoops to the forward and the bold Frivolous and superficial pertness Gentlemen, who take such a fancy to you at first sight Guard against those who make the most court to you Have no pleasures but your own If you will persuade, you must first please Improve yourself with the old, divert yourself with the young Indiscriminately loading their memories with every part alike Insipid in his pleasures, as inefficient in everything else Labor more to put them in conceit with themselves Lay down a method for everything, and stick to it inviolably Let blockheads read what blockheads wrote Let nobody discover that you do know your own value Let them quietly enjoy their errors in taste Man is dishonored by not resenting an affront Manner is full as important as the matter Method Modesty is the only sure bait when you angle for praise Money, the cause of much mischief More people have ears to be tickled, than understandings to judge Most people enjoy the inferiority of their best friends Necessity of scrupulously preserving the appearances Never affect the character in which you have a mind to shine Never read history without having maps No one feels pleasure, who does not at the same time give it Not only pure, but, like Caesar's wife, unsuspected Often more necessary to conceal contempt than resentment Passes for a wit, though he hath certainly no uncommon share Patient toleration of certain airs of superiority People hate those who make them feel their own inferiority People lose a great deal of time by reading Pleased with him, by making them first pleased with themselves Pleasure is necessarily reciprocal Pocket all your knowledge with your watch Put out your time, but to good interest Real merit of any kind will be discovered Respect without timidity Rich man never borrows Same coolness and unconcern in any and every company Seem to like and approve of everything at first Sentiments that were never felt, pompously described She has all the reading that a woman should have She who conquers only catches a Tartar Silence in love betrays more woe Spare the persons while you lash the crimes Steady assurance, with seeming modesty Suspicion of age, no woman, let her be ever so old, ever forgive Take the hue of the company you are with Taking up adventitious, proves their want of intrinsic merit The present moments are the only ones we are sure of Those whom you can make like themselves better Timidity and diffidence To be heard with success, you must be heard with pleasure To be pleased one must please Trifle only with triflers; and be serious only with the serious Trite jokes and loud laughter reduce him to a buffoon Unwilling and forced; it will never please Well dressed, not finely dressed What is impossible, and what is only difficult What pleases you in others, will in general please them in you Whatever real merit you have, other people will discover Wish you, my dear friend, as many happy new years as you deserve Women choose their favorites more by the ear Words are the dress of thoughts Writing what may deserve to be read You must be respectable, if you will be respected Your character there, whatever it is, will get before you here LETTERS TO HIS SON, 1751 [LC#05][lc05sxxx.xxx]3355 If you find that you have a hastiness in your temper, which unguardedly breaks out into indiscreet sallies, or rough expressions, to either your superiors, your equals, or your inferiors, watch it narrowly, check it carefully, and call the 'suaviter in modo' to your assistance: at the first impulse of passion, be silent till you can be soft. He often is unintelligible to his readers, and sometimes so, I dare say, to himself. "The prostrate lover, when he lowest lies, But stoops to conquer, and but kneels to rise." We are so made, we love to be pleased better than to be informed; information is, in a certain degree, mortifying, as it implies our previous ignorance; it must be sweetened to be palatable. Free from the guilt: be free from the suspicion, too. Mankind, as I have often told you, are more governed by appearances than by realities; and with regard to opinion, one had better be really rough and hard, with the appearance of gentleness and softness, than just the reverse. A favor may make an enemy, and an injury may make a friend Affectation of business Applauded often, without approving At the first impulse of passion, be silent till you can be soft Avoid cacophony, and, what is very near as bad, monotony Be silent till you can be soft Being intelligible is now no longer the fashion Better refuse a favor gracefully, than to grant it clumsily Business must be well, not affectedly dressed Business now is to shine, not to weigh Cease to love when you cease to be agreeable Chit-chat, useful to keep off improper and too serious subjects Committing acts of hostility upon the Graces Concealed what learning I had Consciousness of merit makes a man of sense more modest Disagreeable things may be done so agreeably as almost to oblige Disputes with heat Easy without negligence Elegance in one language will reproduce itself in all Every man knows that he understands religion and politics Every numerous assembly is MOB Everybody is good for something Expresses himself with more fire than elegance Frank without indiscretion Full-bottomed wigs were contrived for his humpback Gentleness of manners, with firmness of mind German, who has taken into his head that he understands French Grow wiser when it is too late Habitual eloquence Hardened to the wants and distresses of mankind Have you learned to carve? If free from the guilt, be free from the suspicion, too Inclined to be fat, but I hope you will decline it Indolently say that they cannot do Information implies our previous ignorance; it must be sweetened Information is, in a certain degree, mortifying Insinuates himself only into the esteem of fools It is a real inconvenience to anybody to be fat Know, yourself and others Knowing how much you have, and how little you want Last beautiful varnish, which raises the colors Learn to keep your own secrets Loved without being despised, and feared without being hated Man of sense may be in haste, but can never be in a hurry Mangles what he means to carve Mazarin and Lewis the Fourteenth riveted the shackles Meditation and reflection Mere reason and good sense is never to be talked to a mob Mistimes or misplaces everything Mitigating, engaging words do by no means weaken your argument MOB: Understanding they have collectively none Often necessary, not to manifest all one feels One must often yield, in order to prevail Only because she will not, and not because she cannot Our frivolous dissertations upon the weather, or upon whist Outward air of modesty to all he does Richelieu came and shackled the nation Rochefoucault, who, I am afraid, paints man very exactly See what you see, and to hear what you hear Seems to have no opinion of his own Seldom a misfortune to be childless She has uncommon, sense and knowledge for a woman Speaking to himself in the glass Style is the dress of thoughts Success turns much more upon manner than matter Tacitus Take characters, as they do most things, upon trust They thought I informed, because I pleased them Unaffected silence upon that subject is the only true medium Unintelligible to his readers, and sometimes to himself Use palliatives when you contradict We love to be pleased better than to be informed Woman like her, who has always pleased, and often been pleased Women are the only refiners of the merit of men Yielded commonly without conviction LETTERS TO HIS SON, 1752 [LC#06][lc06sxxx.xxx]3356 Our prejudices are our mistresses; reason is at best our wife, very often heard indeed, but seldom minded. Enjoy every moment; pleasures do not commonly last so long as life, and therefore should not be neglected; and the longest life is too short for knowledge, consequently every moment is precious. A young fellow ought to be wiser than he should seem to be; and an old fellow ought to seem wise whether he really be so or not. Laziness of mind, or inattention, are as great enemies to knowledge as incapacity; for, in truth, what difference is there between a man who will not, and a man who cannot be informed? This difference only, that the former is justly to be blamed, the latter to be pitied. And yet how many there are, very capable of receiving knowledge, who from laziness, inattention, and incuriousness, will not so much as ask for it, much less take the least pains to acquire it! Vicissitudes frequently make friends of enemies, and enemies of friends; you must labor, therefore, to acquire that great and uncommon talent of hating with good-breeding and loving with prudence. Art of pleasing is the most necessary Assenting, but without being servile and abject Assertion instead of argument Attacked by ridicule, and, punished with contempt Bold, but with great seeming modesty Close, without being costive Command of our temper, and of our countenance Company is, in truth, a constant state of negotiation Consider things in the worst light, to show your skill Darkness visible Defended by arms, adorned by manners, and improved by laws Doing nothing, and might just as well be asleep Endeavor to hear, and know all opinions Enjoy all those advantages Few people know how to love, or how to hate Fools, who can never be undeceived Frank, but without indiscretion Frequently make friends of enemies, and enemies of friends Grave without the affectation of wisdom Horace How troublesome an old correspondent must be to a young one I CANNOT DO SUCH A THING Ignorant of their natural rights, cherished their chains Inattention Infallibly to be gained by every sort of flattery Judges from the appearances of things, and not from the reality Keep your own temper and artfully warm other people's King's popularity is a better guard than their army Made him believe that the world was made for him Make every man I met with like me, and every woman love me Man or woman cannot resist an engaging exterior Man who is only good on holydays is good for very little Never seek for wit; if it presents itself, well and good Not making use of any one capital letter Notes by which dances are now pricked down as well as tunes Old fellow ought to seem wise whether he really be so or not Please all who are worth pleasing; offend none Pleasures do not commonly last so long as life Polite, but without the troublesome forms and stiffness Prejudices are our mistresses Quarrel with them when they are grown up, for being spoiled Read with caution and distrust Ruined their own son by what they called loving him Secret, without being dark and mysterious Seeming inattention to the person who is speaking to you Talent of hating with good-breeding and loving with prudence The longest life is too short for knowledge Trifles that concern you are not trifles to me Truth, but not the whole truth, must be the invariable principle Useful sometimes to see the things which one ought to avoid Where one would gain people, remember that nothing is little Wife, very often heard indeed, but seldom minded Wit may created any admirers but makes few friends Young fellow ought to be wiser than he should seem to be LETTERS TO HIS SON, 1753-54 [LC#07][lc07sxxx.xxx]3357 Never to show the least symptom of resentment which you cannot to a certain degree gratify; but always to smile, where you cannot strike. Singularity is only pardonable in old age and retirement; I may now be as singular as I please, but you may not. You will find that reason, which always ought to direct mankind, seldom does; but that passions and weaknesses commonly usurp its seat, and rule in its stead. I look upon indolence as a sort of SUICIDE; for the man is effectually destroyed, though the appetites of the brute may survive. Business by no means forbids pleasures; on the contrary, they reciprocally season each other; and I will venture to affirm, that no man enjoys either in perfection, that does not join both. Reasons alleged are seldom the true ones. It is only the manner of saying or writing it that makes it appear new. Convince yourself that manner is almost everything, in everything; and study it accordingly. According as their interest prompts them to wish Acquainted with books, and an absolute stranger to men Affectation of singularity or superiority All have senses to be gratified Business by no means forbids pleasures Clamorers triumph Doing anything that will deserve to be written Ears to hear, but not sense enough to judge ERE TITTERING YOUTH SHALL SHOVE YOU FROM THE STAGE Good manners are the settled medium of social life Good reasons alleged are seldom the true ones Holiday eloquence I know myself (no common piece of knowledge, let me tell you) Indolence INTOLERATION in religious, and inhospitality in civil matters Kick him upstairs Many are very willing, and very few able Perseverance has surprising effects Pettish, pouting conduct is a great deal too young Reason, which always ought to direct mankind, seldom does Singularity is only pardonable in old age Smile, where you cannot strike To govern mankind, one must not overrate them Too like, and too exact a picture of human nature Vanity, interest, and absurdity, always display Warm and young thanks, not old and cold ones Writing anything that may deserve to be read Young men are as apt to think themselves wise enough Young people are very apt to overrate both men and things LETTERS TO HIS SON, 1756-58 [LC#08][lc08sxxx.xxx]3358 MY DEAR FRIEND: I have so little to do, that I am surprised how I can find time to write to you so often. Do not stare at the seeming paradox; for it is an undoubted truth, that the less one has to do, the less time one finds to do it in. Our conjectures pass upon us for truths; we will know what we do not know, and often, what we cannot know: so mortifying to our pride is the bare suspicion of ignorance! There is not a more prudent maxim than to live with one's enemies as if they may one day become one's friends; as it commonly happens, sooner or later. What have I done to-day? Have I done anything that can be of use to myself or others? Have I employed my time, or have I squandered it? Have I lived out the day, or have I dozed it away in sloth and laziness? Many things which seem extremely probable are not true: and many which seem highly improbable are true. The more one works, the more willing one is to work. We are all, more or less, 'des animaux d'habitude'. Am still unwell; I cannot help it! Apt to make them think themselves more necessary than they are BUT OF THIS EVERY MAN WILL BELIEVE AS HE THINKS PROPER Conjectures pass upon us for truths Enemies as if they may one day become one's friends Have I employed my time, or have I squandered it? Home, be it ever so homely Jog on like man and wife; that is, seldom agreeing Less one has to do, the less time one finds to do it in Many things which seem extremely probable are not true More one works, the more willing one is to work Most ignorant are, as usual, the boldest conjecturers Nipped in the bud No great regard for human testimony Not to communicate, prematurely, one's hopes or one's fears Person to you whom I am very indifferent about, I mean myself Petty jury Something must be said, but that something must be nothing Sow jealousies among one's enemies Think to atone by zeal for their want of merit and importance Think yourself less well than you are, in order to be quite so What have I done to-day? Will pay very dear for the quarrels and ambition of a few LETTERS TO HIS SON, 1759-65 [LC#09][lc09sxxx.xxx]3359 Whatever one MUST do, one should do 'de bonne grace'. Appears that you are rather a gainer by your misfortune. I, who am not apt to know anything that I do not know. In short, let it be your maxim through life to know all you can know, yourself; and never to trust implicitly to the informations of others. This rule has been of infinite service to me in the course of my life. I feel a gradual decay, though a gentle one; and I think that I shall not tumble, but slide gently to the bottom of the hill of life. When that will be, I neither know nor care, for I am very weary. I find nothing much worth either desiring or fearing. But these reflections, which suit with seventy, would be greatly premature at two- and-thirty. So make the best of your time; enjoy the present hour, but 'memor ultimae'. In the intercourse of the world, it is often necessary to seem ignorant of what one knows, and to have forgotten what one remembers. Always made the best of the best, and never made bad worse American Colonies Be neither transported nor depressed by the accidents of life Doing, 'de bonne grace', what you could not help doing EVERY DAY IS STILL BUT AS THE FIRST Everything has a better and a worse side Extremely weary of this silly world Gainer by your misfortune I, who am not apt to know anything that I do not know Intrinsic, and not their imaginary value My own health varies, as usual, but never deviates into good National honor and interest have been sacrificed to private Neither abilities or words enough to call a coach Neither know nor care, (when I die) for I am very weary Never saw a froward child mended by whipping Never to trust implicitly to the informations of others Not make their want still worse by grieving and regretting them Not tumble, but slide gently to the bottom of the hill of life Nothing much worth either desiring or fearing Often necessary to seem ignorant of what one knows Only solid and lasting peace, between a man and his wife Oysters, are only in season in the R months Patience is the only way not to make bad worse Recommends self-conversation to all authors Return you the ball 'a la volee' Settled here for good, as it is called Stamp-duty, which our Colonists absolutely refuse to pay Thinks himself much worse than he is To seem to have forgotten what one remembers We shall be feared, if we do not show that we fear Whatever one must do, one should do 'de bonne grace' Who takes warning by the fate of others? Women are all so far Machiavelians LETTERS TO HIS SON, 1766-71 [LC#10][lc10sxxx.xxx]3360 All I desire for my own burial is not to be buried alive; but how or where, I think must be entirely indifferent to every rational creature. Get what I can, if I cannot get what I will. There must have been some very grave and important reasons for so extraordinary a measure: but what they were I do not pretend to guess; and perhaps I shall never know, though all the coffeehouses here do. I am neither well nor ill, but UNWELL. Those who wish him the best, as I do, must wish him dead. I would have all intoleration intolerated in its turn. Anxiety for my health and life Borough-jobber I shall never know, though all the coffeehouses here do. Read my eyes out every day, that I may not hang myself Stamp-act has proved a most pernicious measure Water-drinkers can write nothing good Would not tell what she did not know THE ENTIRE PG EDITION OF CHESTERFIELD [LC#11][lcewkxxx.xxx]3261 A little learning is a dangerous thing A joker is near akin to a buffoon A favor may make an enemy, and an injury may make a friend Ablest man will sometimes do weak things Above all things, avoid speaking of yourself Above the frivolous as below the important and the secret Above trifles, he is never vehement and eager about them Absolute command of your temper Abstain from learned ostentation Absurd term of genteel and fashionable vices Absurd romances of the two last centuries According as their interest prompts them to wish Acquainted with books, and an absolute stranger to men Advice is seldom welcome Advise those who do not speak elegantly, not to speak Advocate, the friend, but not the bully of virtue Affectation of singularity or superiority Affectation in dress Affectation of business All have senses to be gratified Always made the best of the best, and never made bad worse Always does more than he says Always some favorite word for the time being Always look people in the face when you speak to them Am still unwell; I cannot help it! American Colonies Ancients and Moderns Anxiety for my health and life Applauded often, without approving Apt to make them think themselves more necessary than they are Argumentative, polemical conversations Arrogant pedant Art of pleasing is the most necessary As willing and as apt to be pleased as anybody Ascribing the greatest actions to the most trifling causes Assenting, but without being servile and abject Assertion instead of argument Assign the deepest motives for the most trifling actions Assurance and intrepidity At the first impulse of passion, be silent till you can be soft Attacked by ridicule, and, punished with contempt Attend to the objects of your expenses, but not to the sums Attention to the inside of books Attention and civility please all Attention Author is obscure and difficult in his own language Authority Avoid cacophony, and, what is very near as bad, monotony Avoid singularity Awkward address, ungraceful attitudes and actions Be neither transported nor depressed by the accidents of life Be silent till you can be soft Being in the power of every man to hurt him Being intelligible is now no longer the fashion Better not to seem to understand, than to reply Better refuse a favor gracefully, than to grant it clumsily Blindness of the understanding is as much to be pitied Bold, but with great seeming modesty Borough_jobber Business must be well, not affectedly dressed Business now is to shine, not to weigh Business by no means forbids pleasures BUT OF THIS EVERY MAN WILL BELIEVE AS HE THINKS PROPER Can hardly be said to see what they see Cannot understand them, or will not desire to understand them Cardinal Mazarin Cardinal Richelieu Cardinal de Retz Cardinal Virtues, by first degrading them into weaknesses Cautious how we draw inferences Cease to love when you cease to be agreeable Chameleon, be able to take every different hue Characters, that never existed, are insipidly displayed Cheerful in the countenance, but without laughing Chit_chat, useful to keep off improper and too serious subjects Choose your pleasures for yourself Civility, which is a disposition to accommodate and oblige others Clamorers triumph Close, without being costive Command of our temper, and of our countenance Commanding with dignity, you must serve up to it with diligence Committing acts of hostility upon the Graces Common sense (which, in truth, very uncommon) Commonplace observations Company is, in truth, a constant state of negotiation Complaisance Complaisance to every or anybody's opinion Complaisance due to the custom of the place Complaisant indulgence for people's weaknesses Conceal all your learning carefully Concealed what learning I had Conjectures pass upon us for truths Conjectures supply the defect of unattainable knowledge Connections Connive at knaves, and tolerate fools Consciousness of merit makes a man of sense more modest Consciousness and an honest pride of doing well Consider things in the worst light, to show your skill Contempt Contempt Contempt Content yourself with mediocrity in nothing Conversation_stock being a joint and common property Conversation will help you almost as much as books Converse with his inferiors without insolence Dance to those who pipe Darkness visible Decides peremptorily upon every subject Deep learning is generally tainted with pedantry Deepest learning, without good_breeding, is unwelcome Defended by arms, adorned by manners, and improved by laws Deserve a little, and you shall have but a little Desire to please, and that is the main point Desirous of praise from the praiseworthy Desirous to make you their friend Desirous of pleasing Despairs of ever being able to pay Dexterity enough to conceal a truth without telling a lie Dictate to them while you seem to be directed by them Difference in everything between system and practice Difficulties seem to them, impossibilities Dignity to be kept up in pleasures, as well as in business Disagreeable to seem reserved, and very dangerous not to be so Disagreeable things may be done so agreeably as almost to oblige Disputes with heat Dissimulation is only to hide our own cards Distinction between simulation and dissimulation Distinguish between the useful and the curious Do as you would be done by Do not become a virtuoso of small wares Do what you are about Do what you will but do something all day long Do as you would be done by Do not mistake the tinsel of Tasso for the gold of Virgil Does not give it you, but he inflicts it upon you Doing, 'de bonne grace', what you could not help doing Doing what may deserve to be written Doing nothing, and might just as well be asleep Doing anything that will deserve to be written Done under concern and embarrassment, must be ill done Dress like the reasonable people of your own age Dress well, and not too well Dressed as the generality of people of fashion are Ears to hear, but not sense enough to judge Easy without negligence Easy without too much familiarity Economist of your time Either do not think, or do not love to think Elegance in one language will reproduce itself in all Employ your whole time, which few people do Endeavor to hear, and know all opinions Endeavors to please and oblige our fellow_creatures Enemies as if they may one day become one's friends Enjoy all those advantages Equally forbid insolent contempt, or low envy and jealousy ERE TITTERING YOUTH SHALL SHOVE YOU FROM THE STAGE Establishing a character of integrity and good manners Even where you are sure, seem rather doubtful Every numerous assembly is MOB Every virtue, has its kindred vice or weakness Every man knows that he understands religion and politics Every numerous assembly is a mob Every man pretends to common sense EVERY DAY IS STILL BUT AS THE FIRST Everybody is good for something Everything has a better and a worse side Exalt the gentle in woman and man__above the merely genteel Expresses himself with more fire than elegance Extremely weary of this silly world Eyes and the ears are the only roads to the heart Eyes and ears open and mouth mostly shut Feed him, and feed upon him at the same time Few things which people in general know less, than how to love Few people know how to love, or how to hate Few dare dissent from an established opinion Fiddle_faddle stories, that carry no information along with them Fit to live__or not live at all Flattering people behind their backs Flattery of women Flattery Flexibility of manners is necessary in the course of the world Fools, who can never be undeceived Fools never perceive where they are ill_timed Forge accusations against themselves Forgive, but not approve, the bad. Fortune stoops to the forward and the bold Frank without indiscretion Frank, but without indiscretion Frank, open, and ingenuous exterior, with a prudent interior Frequently make friends of enemies, and enemies of friends Friendship upon very slight acquaintance Frivolous, idle people, whose time hangs upon their own hands Frivolous curiosity about trifles Frivolous and superficial pertness Full_bottomed wigs were contrived for his humpback Gain the heart, or you gain nothing Gain the affections as well as the esteem Gainer by your misfortune General conclusions from certain particular principles Generosity often runs into profusion Genteel without affectation Gentlemen, who take such a fancy to you at first sight Gentleness of manners, with firmness of mind Geography and history are very imperfect separately German, who has taken into his head that he understands French Go to the bottom of things Good manners Good reasons alleged are seldom the true ones Good manners are the settled medium of social life Good company Good_breeding Graces: Without us, all labor is vain Gratitude not being universal, nor even common Grave without the affectation of wisdom Great learning; which, if not accompanied with sound judgment Great numbers of people met together, animate each other Greatest fools are the greatest liars Grow wiser when it is too late Guard against those who make the most court to you Habit and prejudice Habitual eloquence Half done or half known Hardened to the wants and distresses of mankind Hardly any body good for every thing Haste and hurry are very different things Have no pleasures but your own Have a will and an opinion of your own, and adhere to it Have I employed my time, or have I squandered it? Have but one set of jokes to live upon Have you learned to carve? He that is gentil doeth gentil deeds He will find it out of himself without your endeavors Heart has such an influence over the understanding Helps only, not as guides Herd of mankind can hardly be said to think Historians Holiday eloquence Home, be it ever so homely Honest error is to be pitied, not ridiculed Honestest man loves himself best Horace How troublesome an old correspondent must be to a young one How much you have to do; and how little time to do it in Human nature is always the same Hurt those they love by a mistaken indulgence I hope, I wish, I doubt, and fear alternately I shall never know, though all the coffeehouses here do. I shall always love you as you shall deserve. I know myself (no common piece of knowledge, let me tell you) I CANNOT DO SUCH A THING I, who am not apt to know anything that I do not know Idleness is only the refuge of weak minds If free from the guilt, be free from the suspicion, too If you would convince others, seem open to conviction yourself If I don't mind his orders he won't mind my draughts If you will persuade, you must first please If once we quarrel, I will never forgive Ignorant of their natural rights, cherished their chains Impertinent insult upon custom and fashion Improve yourself with the old, divert yourself with the young Inaction at your age is unpardonable Inattention Inattentive, absent; and distrait Inclined to be fat, but I hope you will decline it Incontinency of friendship among young fellows Indiscriminate familiarity Indiscriminately loading their memories with every part alike Indolence Indolently say that they cannot do Infallibly to be gained by every sort of flattery Information is, in a certain degree, mortifying Information implies our previous ignorance; it must be sweetened Injury is much sooner forgotten than an insult Inquisition Insinuates himself only into the esteem of fools Insipid in his pleasures, as inefficient in everything else Insist upon your neither piping nor fiddling yourself Insolent civility INTOLERATION in religious, and inhospitality in civil matters Intrinsic, and not their imaginary value It is a real inconvenience to anybody to be fat It is not sufficient to deserve well; one must please well too Jealous of being slighted Jog on like man and wife; that is, seldom agreeing Judge of every man's truth by his degree of understanding Judge them all by their merits, but not by their ages Judges from the appearances of things, and not from the reality Keep your own temper and artfully warm other people's Keep good company, and company above yourself Kick him upstairs King's popularity is a better guard than their army Know their real value, and how much they are generally overrated Know the true value of time Know, yourself and others Knowing how much you have, and how little you want Knowing any language imperfectly Knowledge is like power in this respect Knowledge: either despise it, or think that they have enough Knowledge of a scholar with the manners of a courtier Known people pretend to vices they had not Knows what things are little, and what not Labor is the unavoidable fatigue of a necessary journey Labor more to put them in conceit with themselves Last beautiful varnish, which raises the colors Laughing, I must particularly warn you against it Lay down a method for everything, and stick to it inviolably Lazy mind, and the trifling, frivolous mind Learn to keep your own secrets Learn, if you can, the WHY and the WHEREFORE Leave the company, at least as soon as he is wished out of it Led, much oftener by little things than by great ones Less one has to do, the less time one finds to do it in Let me see more of you in your letters Let them quietly enjoy their errors in taste Let nobody discover that you do know your own value Let nothing pass till you understand it Let blockheads read what blockheads wrote Life of ignorance is not only a very contemptible, but tiresome Listlessness and indolence are always blameable Little minds mistake little objects for great ones Little failings and weaknesses Loud laughter is the mirth of the mob Love with him, who they think is the most in love with them Loved without being despised, and feared without being hated Low company, most falsely and impudently, call pleasure Low buffoonery, or silly accidents, that always excite laughter Luther's disappointed avarice Machiavel Made him believe that the world was made for him Make a great difference between companions and friends Make himself whatever he pleases, except a good poet Make yourself necessary Make every man I met with like me, and every woman love me Man is dishonored by not resenting an affront Man or woman cannot resist an engaging exterior Man of sense may be in haste, but can never be in a hurry Man who is only good on holydays is good for very little Mangles what he means to carve Manner is full as important as the matter Manner of doing things is often more important Manners must adorn knowledge Many things which seem extremely probable are not true Many are very willing, and very few able Mastery of one's temper May you live as long as you are fit to live, but no longer! May you rather die before you cease to be fit to live May not forget with ease what you have with difficulty learned Mazarin and Lewis the Fourteenth riveted the shackles Meditation and reflection Mere reason and good sense is never to be talked to a mob Merit and good_breeding will make their way everywhere Method Mistimes or misplaces everything Mitigating, engaging words do by no means weaken your argument MOB: Understanding they have collectively none Moderation with your enemies Modesty is the only sure bait when you angle for praise Money, the cause of much mischief More people have ears to be tickled, than understandings to judge More one sees, the less one either wonders or admires More you know, the modester you should be More one works, the more willing one is to work Mortifying inferiority in knowledge, rank, fortune Most people enjoy the inferiority of their best friends Most long talkers single out some one unfortunate man in company Most ignorant are, as usual, the boldest conjecturers Most people have ears, but few have judgment; tickle those ears Much sooner forgive an injustice than an insult My own health varies, as usual, but never deviates into good Mystical nonsense Name that we leave behind at one place often gets before us National honor and interest have been sacrificed to private Necessity of scrupulously preserving the appearances Neglect them in little things, they will leave you in great Negligence of it implies an indifference about pleasing Neither know nor care, (when I die) for I am very weary Neither abilities or words enough to call a coach Neither retail nor receive scandal willingly Never would know anything that he had not a mind to know Never read history without having maps Never affect the character in which you have a mind to shine Never implicitly adopt a character upon common fame Never seek for wit; if it presents itself, well and good Never to speak of yourself at all Never slattern away one minute in idleness Never quit a subject till you are thoroughly master of it Never maintain an argument with heat and clamor Never seem wiser, nor more learned, than the people you are with Never saw a froward child mended by whipping Never to trust implicitly to the informations of others Nipped in the bud No great regard for human testimony No man is distrait with the man he fears, or the woman he loves No one feels pleasure, who does not at the same time give it Not tumble, but slide gently to the bottom of the hill of life Not to communicate, prematurely, one's hopes or one's fears Not only pure, but, like Caesar's wife, unsuspected Not make their want still worse by grieving and regretting them Not making use of any one capital letter Not to admire anything too much Not one minute of the day in which you do nothing at all Notes by which dances are now pricked down as well as tunes Nothing in courts is exactly as it appears to be Nothing much worth either desiring or fearing Nothing so precious as time, and so irrecoverable when lost Observe, without being thought an observer Often more necessary to conceal contempt than resentment Often necessary, not to manifest all one feels Often necessary to seem ignorant of what one knows Oftener led by their hearts than by their understandings Old fellow ought to seem wise whether he really be so or not One must often yield, in order to prevail Only doing one thing at a time Only because she will not, and not because she cannot Only solid and lasting peace, between a man and his wife Our understandings are generally the DUPES of our hearts Our frivolous dissertations upon the weather, or upon whist Out of livery; which makes them both impertinent and useless Outward air of modesty to all he does Overvalue what we do not know Oysters, are only in season in the R months Passes for a wit, though he hath certainly no uncommon share Patience is the only way not to make bad worse Patient toleration of certain airs of superiority Pay your own reckoning, but do not treat the whole company Pay them with compliments, but not with confidence People never desire all till they have gotten a great deal People lose a great deal of time by reading People will repay, and with interest too, inattention People angling for praise People hate those who make them feel their own inferiority Perfection of everything that is worth doing at all Perseverance has surprising effects Person to you whom I am very indifferent about, I mean myself Pettish, pouting conduct is a great deal too young Petty jury Plain notions of right and wrong Planted while young, that degree of knowledge now my refuge Please all who are worth pleasing; offend none Pleased to some degree by showing a desire to please Pleased with him, by making them first pleased with themselves Pleasing in company is the only way of being pleased in yourself Pleasure and business with equal inattention Pleasure is necessarily reciprocal Pleasure is the rock which most young people split upon Pleasures do not commonly last so long as life Pocket all your knowledge with your watch Polite, but without the troublesome forms and stiffness POLITICIANS NEITHER LOVE NOR HATE Prefer useful to frivolous conversations Prejudices are our mistresses Pride remembers it forever Pride of being the first of the company Prudent reserve Public speaking Put out your time, but to good interest Quarrel with them when they are grown up, for being spoiled Quietly cherished error, instead of seeking for truth Read my eyes out every day, that I may not hang myself Read with caution and distrust Real merit of any kind will be discovered Real friendship is a slow grower Reason ought to direct the whole, but seldom does Reason, which always ought to direct mankind, seldom does Receive them with great civility, but with great incredulity Reciprocally profess wishes which they seldom form Recommend (pleasure) to you, like an Epicurean Recommends self_conversation to all authors Refuge of people who have neither wit nor invention of their own Refuse more gracefully than other people could grant Repeating Represent, but do not pronounce Reserve with your friends Respect without timidity Respectful without meanness, easy without too much familiarity Return you the ball 'a la volee' Rich man never borrows Richelieu came and shackled the nation Rochefoucault, who, I am afraid, paints man very exactly Rochefoucault Rough corners which mere nature has given to the smoothest Ruined their own son by what they called loving him Same coolness and unconcern in any and every company Scandal: receiver is always thought, as bad as the thief Scarce any flattery is too gross for them to swallow Scarcely any body who is absolutely good for nothing Scrupled no means to obtain his ends Secret, without being dark and mysterious Secrets See what you see, and to hear what you hear Seem to like and approve of everything at first Seeming frankness with a real reserve Seeming inattention to the person who is speaking to you Seeming openness is prudent Seems to have no opinion of his own Seldom a misfortune to be childless Self_love draws a thick veil between us and our faults Sentiment_mongers Sentiments that were never felt, pompously described Serious without being dull Settled here for good, as it is called Shakespeare She has all the reading that a woman should have She who conquers only catches a Tartar She has uncommon, sense and knowledge for a woman Shepherds and ministers are both men Silence in love betrays more woe Singularity is only pardonable in old age Six, or at most seven hours sleep Smile, where you cannot strike Some complaisance and attention to fools is prudent Some men pass their whole time in doing nothing Something or other is to be got out of everybody Something must be said, but that something must be nothing Sooner forgive an injury than an insult Sow jealousies among one's enemies Spare the persons while you lash the crimes Speaking to himself in the glass Stamp_act has proved a most pernicious measure Stamp_duty, which our Colonists absolutely refuse to pay State your difficulties, whenever you have any Steady assurance, with seeming modesty Studied and elaborate dress of the ugliest women in the world Style is the dress of thoughts Success turns much more upon manner than matter Sure guide is, he who has often gone the road which you want to Suspicion of age, no woman, let her be ever so old, ever forgive Swearing Tacitus Take the hue of the company you are with Take characters, as they do most things, upon trust Take, rather than give, the tone of the company you are in Take nothing for granted, upon the bare authority of the author Taking up adventitious, proves their want of intrinsic merit Talent of hating with good_breeding and loving with prudence Talk often, but never long Talk sillily upon a subject of other people's Talk of natural affection is talking nonsense Talking of either your own or other people's domestic affairs Tell me whom you live with, and I will tell you who you are Tell stories very seldom The longest life is too short for knowledge The present moments are the only ones we are sure of The best have something bad, and something little The worst have something good, and sometimes something great There are many avenues to every man They thought I informed, because I pleased them Thin veil of Modesty drawn before Vanity Think to atone by zeal for their want of merit and importance Think yourself less well than you are, in order to be quite so Thinks himself much worse than he is Thoroughly, not superficially Those who remarkably affect any one virtue Those whom you can make like themselves better Three passions that often put honesty to most severe trials Timidity and diffidence To be heard with success, you must be heard with pleasure To be pleased one must please To govern mankind, one must not overrate them To seem to have forgotten what one remembers To know people's real sentiments, I trust much more to my eyes To great caution, you can join seeming frankness and openness Too like, and too exact a picture of human nature Trifle only with triflers; and be serious only with the serious Trifles that concern you are not trifles to me Trifling parts, with their little jargon Trite jokes and loud laughter reduce him to a buffoon Truth, but not the whole truth, must be the invariable principle Truth leaves no room for compliments Unaffected silence upon that subject is the only true medium Unguarded frankness Unintelligible to his readers, and sometimes to himself Unopened, because one title in twenty has been omitted Unwilling and forced; it will never please Use palliatives when you contradict Useful sometimes to see the things which one ought to avoid Value of moments, when cast up, is immense Vanity, interest, and absurdity, always display Vanity, that source of many of our follies Warm and young thanks, not old and cold ones Water_drinkers can write nothing good We love to be pleased better than to be informed We have many of those useful prejudices in this country We shall be feared, if we do not show that we fear Well dressed, not finely dressed What pleases you in others, will in general please them in you What displeases or pleases you in others What you feel pleases you in them What have I done to_day? What is impossible, and what is only difficult Whatever pleases you most in others Whatever is worth doing at all, is worth doing well Whatever one must do, one should do 'de bonne grace' Whatever real merit you have, other people will discover When well dressed for the day think no more of it afterward Where one would gain people, remember that nothing is little Who takes warning by the fate of others? Wife, very often heard indeed, but seldom minded Will not so much as hint at our follies Will pay very dear for the quarrels and ambition of a few Wish you, my dear friend, as many happy new years as you deserve Wit may created any admirers but makes few friends Witty without satire or commonplace Woman like her, who has always pleased, and often been pleased Women are the only refiners of the merit of men Women choose their favorites more by the ear Women are all so far Machiavelians Words are the dress of thoughts World is taken by the outside of things Would not tell what she did not know Wrapped up and absorbed in their abstruse speculations Writing anything that may deserve to be read Writing what may deserve to be read Wrongs are often forgiven; but contempt never is Yielded commonly without conviction You must be respectable, if you will be respected You had much better hold your tongue than them Young people are very apt to overrate both men and things Young fellow ought to be wiser than he should seem to be Young men are as apt to think themselves wise enough Your merit and your manners can alone raise you Your character there, whatever it is, will get before you here End of this Project Gutenberg Etext of Widger's Quotations from Lord Chesterfield's Letters to his Son, by David Widger